Sexo Porn

It sounds like a particularly inventive pro wrestling stunt: The careful Giantess and the Botox Baby Oven fighting in the aisle of a 747. But that’s exactly what happened on a flight from fresh York to Los Angeles this week as hollywood celebrity Kristen Johnston (3rd Rock from the Sun) verbally sparred with Nadya Suleman (aka the Octomom). Suleman brought her brood of 12 children on the plane with her, and when the flight was delayed for over two hours, apparently the Suleman siblings were too much for Johnston to bear. Johnston came over to Suleman and asked her to keep her children underneath control, to which Suleman seemingly replied “And how would u like me to keep 8 two-year-olds quiet?” A verbal argument ensued, as it should have- one out of control two-year-ripe can ruin a flight for everyone aboard, and 8? We tremble to think. It just goes to show- if u can’t take a 6′ woman yelling at u on an airplane, keep the semen out of your baby oven!

See more from beautiful giantess Kristen Johnston on MrSkin.com!

Sorry, it’s not a sex swing. Unless, of course, she simply failed to boost that particular piece of furniture to Elle Decor magazine…The glossy purveyor of furniture and home decor nobody but obscenely wealthy celebrities can afford tapped the obscenely wealthy celebrity for their fall issue. Gwyneth was asked what home items she simply can’t live out of, and her answers included hand-painted wallpaper, the sacred books of assorted world faiths (all placed at the same level for maximum metaphorical punch, natch), and a bathtub in the bedroom. u heard us. A bathtub in the bedroom. Sounds overweening (thinking about the plumber’s bill alone makes us nauseous), but Gwinnie insists it’s consummate for bathing the kids. Funny- we can think of a hardly any uses for a bathtub in the bedroom, but NONE of 'em involved kids….

See Gwyneth Paltrow’s sexiest nude scenes in and out of the bath at MrSkin.com!

Either Britney Spears has some major hygiene issues to work throughout or her previous bodyguard, Fernando Flores, is looking to win a impressive payday and disgrace his former employer at the same time. We crave we could tell u which one is true, but alas, Britney doesn’t return our calls, even when we promise to buy her all the Cheetos and Cheerwine she wants. What we can tell u is that Flores is suing Spears for $10 million for raunchy harassment. Some of his more colorful accusations are that Spears is mentally unstable, continually chain smokes, unselfconciously picks her nose and farts in front of her staff, and does not wear deodorant, brush her teeth, wear shoes and socks, or bathe for days at a time. About 10 years agone, those claims would have had millions of willing Britney fans crying foul, but hey, this is 2011. Britney’s been legally declared incompetent for years now. At this point, we should all just be grateful she doesn’t throw poop like a chimpanzee.

Look Into Britney in happier, sweeter smelling days, like her 2002 movie Crossroads, on MrSkin.com!

Lindsay Lohan was not at any time an unsightly duckling. In fact, she was much more lovable previous to her metamorphosis into a drug-addled, kombucha-swilling swan. But that hasn’t stopped the aged child celebrity from walking horror voided urine that she wasn’t considered for the role which won Natalie Portman an Oscar. In a profile of Lohan published this week in Plum Miami magazine, reporter Jaqueline Powers says that Lohan told her she studied ballet until she was nineteen, and coz of this she was “indignant” that she wasn't considered for the movie ghetto Swan. Well, I was on the basketball team in sixth grade, but u don’t watch me going around protesting that the NBA draft passed me by anew this year. It would have been pretty awesome to watch Lindsay make out with Mila Kunis though.

You can check up on the breast of Oscar-winner (in her own mind, at least) Lindsay Lohan on MrSkin.com.

Poor Rumer Willis. Not merely did she have the unfortunate luck to inherit her father Bruce Willis’ bone structure, but if she tries to do anything about it, the tabloids just won’t shut up. Rumer has been the object of many plastic surgery rumors over the years, from her nose to her chin, and now her hooters are the newest subject of media tongue-wagging. The Enquirer recently asked a plastic surgeon if Rumer’s rack was the work of God or fucker, and the good doctor told that Rumer’s boobies were probably implants, since she has gained two cup sizes since 2008, but that her surgeon “should be patting himself or herself on the back!” Of course she could have too gained those two cup sizes the aged-fashioned way- with In-N-Out Burger. Either way, we’re patting ourselves on the front to this second-generation starlet’s recent curves.

Real or fake? Do some rock-hard skinvestigation of your own with Rumer Willis on MrSkin.com

First, a disclaimer: If any portion of this book, including the dedication, was really typed out by any one of the Kardashian sisters and not described to a ghost writer whilst getting a pedicure, then I'm the Queen of England. in any case, ghost written or not, the names Kourtney: Khloe: Kim- KARDASHIAN are splayed across the flashy leopard print cover of “Dollhouse,” the sisters’ literary debut. Naturally, the book is about the glamourous comings and goings of a “family in the spotlight.” Despite the parallels to their real life (whatsoever that means for the Kardashians), Kim says it is partly made-up and “u’ll have to make a decision for yourself which story lines are true to life, and which ones we dreamed up.” We suggest u pair it with Snooki’s novel, A Shore Thing, the combination of which will render u functionally illiterate. That’s okay- reading is for unsightly people, in any case.

See the Kardashian sisters- Kim, Kourtney and Khloe- naked and raunchy on MrSkin.com!

Ben Flajnik may have come in second place on this season of The Bachelorette, but we wager that guy’s not too torn up about it. The reason? Jennifer Love Hewitt. JLH is a verified fan of the show, and the day after the finale she tweeted that Ben had accepted “my last rose.” A scarcely any short days later, the reality show runner-up and the stacked Party of Five celebrity were seen canoodling in a San Francisco pub. Who needs first place, in any case- those long, beautiful blossoms JLH has on her chest make for an astounding consolation prize.

See steamy pics of Jennifer Love Hewitt, including her jug-illating nip slip in The Tuxedo (2002), on MrSkin.com

Look, Ryan Reynolds. u did good when u put a ring on Scarlett Johansson. The World knows that that woman is sex on two legs. But u messed up, buddy. u messed up when u divorced her, but we are here to assist u. We imagine u don’t read the gossip blogs much, so we’ll fill u in: according to Us Weekly, the former Mrs. Reynolds is now thinking about getting back jointly with her ex-hubby. A source told the gossip rag that Scarlett has been calling Reynolds unendingly, asking how this guy’s been, wanting to meet up: “She’s doing anything possible to get him to take her back. Even saying she?s ready to have a baby.” Seriously, do u have any idea how good looking your children would be? Just pick up the phone, Ryan. u know u want to.

Find Scarlett Johansson nude at MrSkin.com!

Now here’s a shocker- Us Weekly jumped the expression gun when they plastered the words GETTING MARRIED! onto a picture of Brad Pitt and Angelina Jolie this week. Despite Us Weekly’s assertion that three separate sources had told 'em that ace pair would wed this summer, now other, apparently more dependable sources are saying there’s not a drop of truth to the celebrity rag’s tongue-wagging. Apparently the pair’s ever-growing cadre of children has asked 'em about marriage, and Angelina would “find it stiff” to say no to her beloved brood. But for now, Brad and Angelina will remain married to their careers, and jubilantly un-married to each other.

See skintillating uncovered pics of uber-hottie Angelina Jolie, including her sexy episode in Original Sin (2001), on MrSkin.com!

After years spent apart building (or ruining, as the case may be) their careers, Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan are BFFS 4 LIFE one time more. Lindsay continuing her latest probation celebration tour by spending the weekend partying in Malibu at former frienemy Paris’ beach abode. Though she was told by judge Stephanie Sautner to “get your life in order” a mere 10 days agone, Lindsay partied at Paris’ pad until 4am, when she was seen leaving the property with her hoodie pulled over her face. Lindsay then got into a chauffeured car and was driven away. watch Lindsay’s matured- she has a driver now!

Party like it’s 2006 with Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan au naturel on MrSkin.com!